I started writing this article several days ago. Putting down my thoughts I grew more and more aware that they were uglier than my normal uplifting happy and focused words. I pressed the backspace button until every word was wiped clean. Now looking at nothing but white space, and a romantic picture, I start again.
What I once thought would be a witty and humorous approach to a topic, soon turned into sarcasm and something similar to griping. I have had some major fluctuations in productivity lately due to a sore foot, and also a crazy desire to improve things in my life. The contrast seems so very stark that at times it feels like I am weighed down by a ship anchor, and others I am soring blistering heights.
The Price of Productivity is much the same way, at times we accomplish our goals, look out and feel overwhelming joy at the accomplishments of our hard work. Other times, we step back and realize the Price of Productivity is merely having more work to do. We look out and don’t see joy, we see routine, sacrifice, and a dull, heavy feeling.
The price we pay, is the effort we put forth. Going on a road trip strictly to drive to a location will yield different results than going on a road trip to enjoy your time and freedom.
My darling sister recently reminded me that I don’t express the same joy that I have the majority of my life. She reminded me that life is short, a gift, and in my hands to improve. My desire is and always has been to share love with my children. To teach them to love people, love life, and to love themselves. Now of course I realize that I have, as of late, been putting forth less than my best effort. How am I teaching that zeal for life, when I clearly am not using it?
The bible makes it clear that woman are not to get caught up in busy work, and I believe I now have a different understanding of that verse. What I understood one way, I now appreciate an entirely different way.
A couple of days ago I was able to join my mom and sis for some cooking baking. I watched as the 5 kids played together (my three and sis’s two) soaking up as much of each other as they could. They bounced around at each new cookie being made, they squealed with delight, and shook with laughter.
Their joy was easy to see, it radiated off of them, and in many ways was a fun addictive stimulant for the evening. I tired quickly, much to my own sadness and the disappointment of my sister, she is a cooking baking goddess. In fact that may just be her new blog name.
As the time for New Year’s resolutions are coming up, I find myself drawn to this fun little tradition, one that I have barely participated in years past. However, I am seeing there are many things that need improvement in my life, and yes, I do want to change them. I am not waiting for the specific night of the new year to start my changes. I have started them now. I do hope in weeks to come my family will see my childlike joy radiating off of me once more. I hope that my children will look at me and see clearly what it is that I hope to teach them about life. I hope that those moments that the anchor falls, I am able to smile through them knowing full well I just left, and will soon be entering a new blistering height.
I will maintain my positive fun Mom points of views for my readers. You deserve the best. Thank you all for sticking with me through those rough patches of 2013, and I look forward to your comments, fun emails, and suggestions through 2014.
~ Jenn aka. Mom